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The Choices We Make When We’re Lonely

I found myself sitting in a walk-in clinic in Toronto and wondering if the cute doctor was working. A few years ago, I was anemic and had been visiting the clinic regularly for blood tests and there was one particular doctor who was just a lovely human (and pretty cute). And as I sat there, memories from back then came flooding back. I remember becoming a little obsessed with him. I looked for him on Facebook. I remember wondering if he was single. When I figured out that he had a girlfriend, I creeped her photos. As I think of this today, I can’t believe I did it. But then I thought about how I felt back then. Where was I emotionally? Why would I do that? Because I was so lonely. And with this loneliness comes the fear that there is no one out there for us. We [...]

By | 2019-09-03T13:44:32+00:00 September 3rd, 2019|Categories: Hope, Relationships, Spiritual Growth|0 Comments

Love May Be Hiding in Plain Sight

People are falling in love all around me. Yesterday, I met a new friend who said that she met a man and has fallen in love. Two days before that, a good friend came for lunch. “You wouldn’t believe it. She lived right down the street from me.” A week before that, another friend fell in love with a man she met on Tinder. Today, I found out that another friend is dating a man who is blowing her mind. And what do all of these stories have in common?  THEY NEVER WOULD HAVE RECOGNIZED THIS PERSON. In every story, their new love doesn’t fit what they thought they were looking for, attracted to or wanted in their life. For some, the person isn’t physically, or intellectually what they thought they were attracted to. For others, they live too far away, have animals, children, the “wrong” job, or just [...]

By | 2019-05-17T10:11:17+00:00 May 17th, 2019|Categories: Relationships|0 Comments

A Graceful Exit – Divorcing in Love

Whenever I told people that we were separating, the overwhelming response was, “OMG what happened? You guys were SUCH A GREAT COUPLE!” The assumption was that there had to be “something” that “broke us up”. But the truth was, after over 20 years, whether we wanted it or not, our paths had diverged. It was the clearest moment when I knew that it was over. I wanted something. He didn't want it. There was a passive power struggle (we were both peace-keepers). And the realization hit me that we actually wanted different things in life now. Our children were nearly grown-up. Twenty-two years ago, we wanted the same things in life. And perhaps our paths had started separating years before. But we weren't willing to look at it because we both believed strongly in the institution of marriage. It was normal to have ups and downs, right? We were taught [...]

By | 2019-05-17T10:28:32+00:00 January 8th, 2018|Categories: Relationships, tantra|Tags: , , , , , , |0 Comments